I recently came across an article on Buzzfeed about the pointlessness of credit card chips. I had a couple instant emotions: OH MY GOD THEY ARE, why didn’t I write this, holy shit these memes are hilarious and seriously spot on, and WHY DIDN’T I WRITE THIS. Anyway, credit card chips in my opinion have been created to make us look stupid. The honchos over in the world of credit cards are like hey guys, how funny would it be to install a chip into credit cards that will make it longer and harder to pay. Thanks guys!

Have you ever gone to the grocery store for just some olive oil and you end up walking out with three bags full of groceries that you don’t need, or you’re at the mall and you’re just trying to buy a moisturizer that you just ran out of but then you see a really cute pair of jeans that fit like a glove and oh wait! That top would look so damn cute with these new jeans…holy shit those shoes are to die for. You walk out of whatever store elated that you’re going to look so great when you go out tonight but you’re mad as hell for swiping your credit card when you shouldn’t have bought [insert whatever you bought] anyway. Well now you can do all that while torturing yourself even longer at the checkout line!


That moment of shame that comes when the clerk is ringing you up and you’re still debating if you should just run out of the store so that you don’t spend that money you don’t have just got longer. Plus you now get the added benefit of confusion. Should I swipe? Should I put my chip in? Why the hell is it asking me 400 questions? Oh it didn’t work? Why the hell does it beep so loudly when it’s done reading my chip???? You know those fat cats are just sitting around laughing at the fact that we can’t stop using our credit cards. Even though the chips are annoying we still are going to have to use them. As the line becomes longer and longer behind you, you question your sanity and try to not tackle the clerk across from you.

Anyway, I started thinking about it and credit card chips started to appear right about the same time our entire world decided that it was going to start behaving as badly as it possibly could. Coincidence? I think not. These chips have been funneled into our daily lives as a punishment. At least that is how I look at it. I get it they are meant to protect our identity and information better but in today’s day and age you would think that someone would figure out a way that could be done without making our lives harder. I mean we are living in a world where you can facetime with someone across the country in a matter of 15 seconds. For this reason and others I have decided that this chip business has been made difficult for us on purpose. Guys, just think about it…